We may have dodged half a bullet today, but still no final word. We're hoping to hear good news by Monday. At the very least, this has all caused me to finely hone my super-frugal drive and I will keep at it. I felt much better this morning in general. More like I had my head solidly on my shoulders rather than spinning in circles. No matter what, we can do this. Even if it means selling the house. Even if we had to live in a 2-bedroom apartment. Because the only things that ultimately matter is having the six of us together, under one roof, with enough to eat, living a torahdik life.
Someone asked me yesterday if I ever regretted being a one-income family, because it increases financial risk if unemployment should occur. The answer was a whole-hearted NO. It has never even occurred to us to become a dual income family. In the very worst situation, I might add some piano students in the hours after Dean comes home from work, and B"H I can make a very good hourly income that way. Income can be managed one way or another to meet our needs, even if by the skin of our teeth. What can't ever be replaced is that time with our children, gently molding their neshamas, guiding their yetzer hatov, and helping them to be "honor students" (students that have honor). They are growing stronger roots than any money could buy. And because an adult is in the home making the home a home—a peaceful, holy refuge—this home has a palpable heartbeat. It is a living thing, full of Hashem's shechina. No amount of money could create such a refuge.